9.24.2008

New Playdate (or why I have a hard time making friends)


New Meet-up Event!! George the Train!!! http://www.gcrd.org/georgethetrain.html
Where:The Pavilion
When:2:00
I am choosing to have it at 2:00 because it is a good time for me. I know a lot of your children will be napping, but I personally chose this time for that reason (if they are still napping, they won't appreciate it anyway and you should save your money.) It's $2 a rider, now. They do not take credit at the station, but I believe you can buy tickets in the Pavilion if you can't plan ahead and go to an ATM. No, taxes are not applicable. We will play on the little ghetto playground for a while afterwards, and yes, your child will get dirty and there is nothing for babies to do. Oh, and there is no shade; so do me a favor and watch The Weather Channel in the morning, and dress accordingly. If it is hot out, you should, maybe...wear shorts. If it is cold, hmmmm...wear a jacket and put little SheNayNay Margaret in shoes. I'll be waiting at the picnic table under the little shelter, to the right of the train, wearing a sign that says, "I am the Dumb*ss Hostessing This Event For You Ungrateful A*sholes.". I may have a bow in my hair to match. I will personally seek out all new members and chat with them a bit, so they feel very welcomed. I may ask personal and inappropriate questions to amuse myself, and because I would like for you to be even more uncomfortable than I am. No offense is meant. It is a short ride on the train and is a bit expensive, so if anyone is planning on being unhappy about honoring their RSVP and rating the event anything less than a perfect '5,' please do me a favor and RSVP 'no.' If you are planning on RSVP'ing 'yes' and don't show up, I will personally drive over to your home to check on your inconsiderate self, and let you borrow my copy of Emily Post in which I've highlighted pertinent etiquette.

Can't wait to meet you all!
Watch the calendar for more fun events!

10 comments:

GiGi said...

OMG LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT!!! You described everything so perfectly... you know those were some of my first thoughts too... I have discovered that their is a right way and a SC way of doing things. I tend to do things my way... maybe thats why I have no friends either...hmmm..... xoxo

Amanda K. said...

Awesome!!! Now, Amy W, I'm from good ol' SC, and I have proper etiquite..LOL!!! There are just too many inconsiderate people out there, and I wish that this could get posted..LOL!

Anonymous said...

So true!!! Can I post it, PLEASE!!!
V

GiGi said...

Ok, I had to read it again... its just TOO GOOD!!! I might have to post this on my blog.. I won't mention your name but I will give credit to a great writer!!! I pee every time I read it. Ha ha ha ha ha especially the part about the sign and matching bow!!!!!!

Tonya said...

Brilliant! Even though I don't know what you are speaking of specifically, it was amazingly said.

Anonymous said...

I love you...you make me smile and if you are "discovered" someday and are really rich I am totally claiming you as my friend and expect perks. I remember I was SO offended b.c I hosted a night out and someone rated it lower than a five b.c they showed up late and had to sit at a nearby table and commented that they weren't included.
M.

Valerie said...

Where do I sign up?? LOL
We were talking about a way to identify other 'moms' at outdoor playdates. I think these (http://www.snopes.com/medical/toxins/hairband.asp) bands in a firey red worn proudly around the wrist would be a nice addition to your playdate. blah!

Unknown said...

Too funny. I knew there was a reason we get along so well!! :-) You rock!

Anonymous said...

ROFL that is too funny I really thought I had missed a playdate that you had hosted hahahaha

Lila Armock said...

So...what you're saying is...you really want to host more playdates?

Ahahaha...seriously, do you have novels out under a secret name? I won't tell...